My fiendish brethren, the Eve of All Souls is nigh upon us! In preparation for this most unholy of days, our head Warlock ahem I mean Chef Nick has been slaving away over his cauldron for weeks on end, reciting the ancient incantations of vegan alchemy. We have seen the dark spirits steaming forth from his potent brew, watched from afar with awe and fear in our cold hearts as he summoned forth such deliciousness that we knew the rumors to be true – that he was indeed the very reincarnation of the first vegan the New World has ever known, one Winnefred Duzzeldurf, who we all know was burned at the stake in Salem for her heretical lack of cruelty toward all creatures who stalked the land. At long last, with a maniacal cackling issuing from the skies that could be none other than the perpetually tormented soul of Winnefred herself, in a demented delight over her posthumous conquest of man’s taste buds, Chef Nick doffed his wizardly cloak, the roiling clouds of smoke dissolved, and behold – there was…
THE PEANUT BUTTER TOFU BOWL SPECIAL, served over a bowl of brown rice with mung bean sprouts and red slaw, topped with cilantro and crushed peanuts! Winnefred, you are avenged at long last…
To complement this dastardly delight, we have a Side of Newt’s Eyeballs with Lizard Tongue (Mediterranean Quinoa Salad) and a Soup of Monk’s Tripe with Strips of Charr’ed Nunflesh (Tortilla with Vegan Chorizo)
And what spell is complete without a hefty smattering of sinful vegan sweetness? Today we have Chocolate Peanut Butter Cobweb Cake, Chocolate Chip Cookie Sandwiches, “Cream Cheese” Brownies, Carrot Cake, Snicker Doodle Cake, Raw White Chocolate Raspberry “Cheesecake,” Maple Spice, Chocolate Ganache, Chocolate Coconut, Carrot Cake, and Chocolate-filled Giant Cookies n’ Cream Cupcakes, and Whole-wheat Pumpkin Loaves!